Thursday, August 08, 2002
Ooof. Headaches |1:47 PM|
I managed to get the front page archives up and running again. That took some doing, as I had 2 sets of 3 files, from different dates, and in varying states of completion. Luckily, after the removal of some corrupt articles, I had some nice "landmarks" within the files to work with. It was still a major pain the ass, and the comment filenames are hideous.

I'm still waiting for word back from Time Warner. Another part of this process that bothers me is that though I think I'm above tech support, there is still a chance that I might not get the job.
I've got a massive headache, but I am resisting taking any medication.

Thinks to be pleased about:
My car will be repaired.
I have a frozen pizza waiting for me at home.
With any luck all my finacial troubles will be struck down.
It's a nice sunny day.

Those damn cheeto balls with tabasco sauce are killers, though. Christ.

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Wednesday, August 07, 2002
Time to build a coffee table |2:24 PM|
I wonder how hard it would be to construct a coffee table with the limited hand tools I have available. The fact that I don't have a garage probably hurts my chances for success. The lack of a saw to speak of is probably the most dooming factor. But dammit, I want to build. I want to create something. It's either manual labor or screwing a woman until I have offspring.
I think the reproduction idea is an incredibly bad one.

In a remarkably responsible move I think I'm going to skip poker tonight. I just don't have the cash to risk it on cards. Yeah, I'm doing a lot better nowadays, but I need to save for just a little while longer. If (if if if if) I get this job at Time Warner, just about all of my problems will vanish within two weeks.

I feel kind of sick to my stomach. It's a feeling like when you're riding up the first ramp on a rollercoaster, but without any fun. It's not like a doctors office wait, where you could get up and leave, or at the end of it you know you're going to be better. It's gravity. I've already sent the app. With any luck and a good interview I'll be hired. I'll be miserable in a new way. First loop is less sleep.
Upside down and waiting for the end, I'll work towards putting money away. I won't be able to stand much, not much of it all, but for once I'd be debt free.
Debt. Free. For the first time in 2 years.
It would be such blessed relief. My headaches would vanish. My diet could improve. I'd have disposable income I don't feel guilt about using.

Freeeeeeeee

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Tuesday, August 06, 2002
Wow. Steel belts poked me |11:13 PM|
My car has served me well, but it's clear that I have abused it in some ways. That shimmy at 60 miles an hour I might have mentioned before turned out to be my tires. I had worn the bastards down to the point the steel belts were showing.
Fuck.
That's what I get for getting my work done at Walmart/Sam's Club. Okay, I shouldn't knock Sam's Club, but clearly the tires I got might have been a little on the cheap side. Whatever happened, I now need new tires in addition to all the rest of the work needed on my car. I'm heading out to the mechanic at about 6:30am tommorow. I hope I can afford all this before my tires explode and my car is hurled into a ditch, only to roll half a dozen times before coming to rest in a cow pasture. I, by that point, will be rasberry jam.

Where oh where has my motivation gone? Oh where oh where could it be?

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Monday, August 05, 2002
Tired of fooling around. |4:05 PM|
Right, well, the cops got me again. Thanks, guys. This sort of throws a fucking monkey wrench into the works.
But my application is in at Time Warner. With any luck, I'll be doing soul crushing tech support yet again, this time at night.

What a damn joke this is all turning out to be. I feel pointless. I'm trying to avoid self pity, and keeping my aim up, but this is just getting stupid. I'll just keep trudging along. Who am I doing this for, anymore? I'm certainly unhappy. If it's just for me, then I need a new career. Maybe proffesional underwater bricklayer. I just don't know anymore.

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