Friday, February 15, 2002
I pull stitches out with my teeth |11:08 AM| The man my department reports to at Dell used to be portrayed rather poorly. Now that we've got most of this printin' situation hammered out, he isn't looking like such a bad character anymore. He's just fully policy driven. I guess the difference is that now we know there really isn't malice involved. This isn't really an apology, since I don't think he'll ever, ever, hear about this page, but I felt that I had to paint him less as a bad guy.

I was at a computer store a little while ago, and I observed a couple total goddamn losers. One was the guy running the Apple store. He looked about 30, with a sun leathered face that wrinkled like someone had balled up a napkin and then done a piss poor job flattening it out. He was hitting on a girl that couldn't have been more than 18, who obviously wanted to be anywhere else. Both were store employees, the girl was walking a slow loop up and down the aisles of software. Her unsure gait made it clear she couldn't figure out a proper excuse to walk away from the guy, and she kept tracing lines with her finger across the endcaps, obviously hoping to get caught up in the task of cleaning them. The apple guy's body language was trying to be non threatening but instead emitted pure sleaziness, and from what snatches of conversation I happened to hear while I was looking at some memory upgrades made it clear the guy was talking all things Apple and Apple sales. I'm not saying this guy was a loser for being a fan of Apple, but he seemed to think that merely spewing the same stupid technology crapola that he got a hard on for would cause the girl to tear off her clothes and demand to be ravaged "RIGHT HERE!. Near the GARDENING software!". It was educational, in the sense that it pounded home the point "know your audience" and "don't hit on women half your age". I think the partial encounter has stuck with me because I felt the need to go slap the guy around, if only to let the girl escape. (She later pounced on the first customer looking at monitors with a "Hi-do-you-need-any-help?" leaving the apple guy to go rub up against an Imac)

0 Comments:

Post a Comment

Archives
07/15/2001", "07/29/2001", "08/12/2001", "08/19/2001", "08/26/2001", "09/23/2001", "09/30/2001", "10/07/2001", "10/14/2001", "10/21/2001", "10/28/2001", "11/04/2001", "11/11/2001", "11/18/2001", "11/25/2001", "12/02/2001", "12/09/2001", "12/16/2001", "12/23/2001", "12/30/2001", "01/06/2002", "01/13/2002", "01/20/2002", "01/27/2002", "02/03/2002", "02/10/2002", "02/17/2002", "02/24/2002", "03/03/2002", "03/10/2002", "03/17/2002", "03/24/2002", "03/31/2002", "04/07/2002", "04/14/2002", "04/21/2002", "04/28/2002", "05/05/2002", "05/12/2002", "05/19/2002", "05/26/2002", "06/02/2002", "06/09/2002", "06/16/2002", "06/23/2002", "06/30/2002", "07/07/2002", "07/14/2002", "07/21/2002", "07/28/2002", "08/04/2002", "08/11/2002", "08/18/2002", "08/25/2002", "09/01/2002", "09/08/2002", "09/15/2002", "09/22/2002", "09/29/2002", "10/06/2002", "10/13/2002", "10/20/2002", "10/27/2002", "11/03/2002", "11/10/2002", "11/17/2002", "11/24/2002", "12/01/2002", "01/05/2003", "01/12/2003", "01/19/2003", "01/26/2003", "02/02/2003", "02/09/2003", "02/16/2003", "02/23/2003", "03/02/2003", "03/09/2003", "03/16/2003", "03/23/2003", "03/30/2003", "04/06/2003", "04/13/2003", "04/20/2003", "04/27/2003", "05/04/2003", "05/11/2003", "05/18/2003", "05/25/2003", "06/01/2003", "06/08/2003", "06/15/2003", "06/22/2003", "06/29/2003", "07/06/2003", "07/13/2003", "07/20/2003", "07/27/2003", "08/03/2003", "08/10/2003", "08/24/2003", "09/07/2003", "09/14/2003", "10/12/2003", "10/19/2003", "10/26/2003", "12/07/2003", "12/14/2003", "12/21/2003", "12/28/2003", "01/11/2004", "01/18/2004", "01/25/2004", "02/01/2004", "02/08/2004", "02/15/2004", "02/22/2004", "02/29/2004", "03/07/2004", "03/14/2004", "03/21/2004", "03/28/2004", "04/04/2004", "04/11/2004", "04/18/2004", "04/25/2004", "05/02/2004", "05/09/2004", "05/16/2004", "05/23/2004", "05/30/2004", "06/06/2004", "06/13/2004", "06/20/2004", "06/27/2004", "07/04/2004", "07/11/2004", "07/18/2004", "07/25/2004", "08/01/2004", "08/08/2004", "08/15/2004", "08/22/2004", "08/29/2004", "09/05/2004", "09/19/2004", "09/26/2004", "10/03/2004", "10/10/2004", "10/17/2004", "10/24/2004", "10/31/2004", "11/07/2004", "11/14/2004", "11/21/2004", "11/28/2004", "12/05/2004", "12/12/2004", "01/16/2005", "01/30/2005", "02/20/2005", "02/27/2005", "03/06/2005", "03/13/2005", "03/27/2005", "04/10/2005", "04/17/2005", "04/24/2005", "05/01/2005", "05/08/2005", "05/15/2005", "05/22/2005", "07/03/2005", "07/10/2005", "07/24/2005", "07/31/2005", "09/18/2005", "12/11/2005", "12/18/2005", "12/25/2005", "01/01/2006", "01/08/2006", "02/26/2006", "03/05/2006", "03/12/2006", "03/19/2006", "03/26/2006", "04/02/2006", "04/09/2006", "04/16/2006", "04/23/2006", "05/28/2006", "10/08/2006", "11/05/2006", "11/12/2006", "11/19/2006", "11/26/2006", "12/10/2006", "12/17/2006", "12/24/2006", "12/31/2006", "01/07/2007", "01/14/2007", "01/21/2007", "01/28/2007", "02/04/2007", "02/11/2007", "02/18/2007", "02/25/2007", "03/04/2007", "03/11/2007", "03/18/2007", "03/25/2007", "04/01/2007", "04/08/2007", "04/15/2007", "04/22/2007", "04/29/2007", "05/06/2007", "05/13/2007", "05/20/2007", "06/03/2007", "06/10/2007", "06/17/2007", "06/24/2007", "07/01/2007", "07/08/2007", "07/15/2007", "07/22/2007", "07/29/2007", "08/05/2007", "08/19/2007", "08/26/2007", "09/02/2007", "09/09/2007", "09/16/2007", "09/30/2007", "10/07/2007", "10/14/2007", "10/21/2007", "10/28/2007", "11/25/2007", "12/02/2007", "12/09/2007", "12/16/2007", "01/13/2008", "01/20/2008", "02/10/2008", "02/17/2008", "03/09/2008", "03/30/2008", "05/11/2008", "05/18/2008", "05/25/2008", "06/01/2008", "06/08/2008", "06/15/2008", "06/22/2008", "06/29/2008", "07/06/2008", "07/13/2008", "07/20/2008", "07/27/2008", "08/10/2008", "11/08/2009", ); //Pulls stuff out from the given string (assuming it is the right length) //51 places in should be the year. function ExtractYear($WholeDateString) { ////String extract the first part, up until 60 $StringYear = substr($WholeDateString, 60); ///extract everything before the _ $StringYear = strtok($StringYear, "_"); return $StringYear; } function ExtractMonth($WholeURlMonth) { /////Extract the month $WholeURlMonth = substr($WholeURlMonth, 65); $WholeURlMonth = strtok($WholeURlMonth, "_"); return $WholeURlMonth; } function ExtractWeek($WholeURLWeek) { /////Extract the week, which will be the title of each link $WholeURLWeek = substr($URLWeek, 81); $WholeURLWeek = strtok($URLWeek, "<"); echo $WholeURLWeek; } $MyDateArray = array('01' => 'January', '02' => 'February', '03' => 'March', '04' => 'April', '05' => 'May', '06' => 'June', '07' => 'July', '08' => 'August', '09' => 'September', '10' => 'October', '11' => 'November', '12' => 'December'); ///Extract ///$StringMonth /////We need to know which DIV we're in. We need one created for the years, and then the months. The months are the /////tricky ones, since they need their ID to increase more than the years, but since the functions keep referencing ///// the same name system, we have to be careful not to make the years close up when we click on a month. ///Set some Variables $YearMenuID = 1; /////What ID the preceding year link controls. Needs to be same for all the months under a given year. $MonthMenuID= 1; ////What ID the preceding month link controls. Needs to be the same for all the weeks under a given ////Month but not the same as any year, etc. $LastYearUsed = 0; $LastMonthUsed = 0; echo '

'; /////That should be the "Year" div. All the years should be in this one DIV. ///Start the main loop. foreach ($myDateArray as $key => $value) { ////Pulling the year/date. $month = ExtractMonth($value); $year = ExtractYear($value); $YearMenuID = $year; $MonthMenuID = $month; $PrettyMonth = $MyDateArray[$month]; ////Is this a new year? If ($year != $LastYearUsed) ///Then we need to put the year down. No DIV created quite yet. { ///First off, we need to close the preceding year's DIV. Twice if it ain't 2001 if ($year != 2001) { echo '

'; } echo '

$myDateArray[$key]

_HTML2_; ///That creates a DIV for the year (month based links) then the month (week based links). ////Then the first weekly link. ///That should have made a link to the weekly archive file. ///As well as creating the first month link, which is in its own DIV, } Else { ///Okay, it's not a new year. So, we need to check if it's a new month. If($month != $LastMonthUsed) { //So it's a new month. That means we need to put down a link for the month to control the div //that contains the weekly links. //First, though, we need to close up the previous month echo '

$myDateArray[$key]

_HTML3_; } Else /////////So it's not a new month, then we just need to put down the weekly link. { echo '

' . $myDateArray[$key] . '

'; } } $LastMonthUsed = $month; $LastYearUsed = $year; } ECHO '